Academy bans ABC’s Sheen interview promo during Oscars ‘cause he’s one funny crackhead!
Original story: The Hollywood Reporter
The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences has über power over its Oscar broadcast and can veto any promos or ads it doesn’t like. Charlie Sheen jokes around just like a death row inmate. So the math here is simple: Hollywood’s most commanding officialdom secretly knows Sheen would have made a way better Oscar host than Anne Hathaway or James Franco (or their mothers – WTF?)
If the Academy is going to actively participate in hiding the dark side of fame, it can’t claim the high road anyway. So why not exploit the jittery ramblings of a hard-core crack addict in front of nearly one billion worldwide viewers? What’s the difference? It’d be less hypocritical and far more in-touch with young people than precious princess Anne or fade-into-the-background Franco. Besides, even fresh from smoking seven-gram chunks of cocaine Sheen’s faster with the comebacks and zingers then either of those pandering tools. What did they accomplish besides ruining an audience growth streak?
Watching “Tiger Blood” Sheen flail and twitch around the microphone like the Wizard of Oz scarecrow with those absolutely mad Charlie Sheen eyebrows would be all wrong and brilliant – certainly more entertaining than Hathaway’s saccharin cooing, gushing (and interrupting). Imagine the looks on those stodgy ‘ol Academy faces as Charlie-the-host started doing his impression of the “droopy-eyed armless children” he insists his own drug use makes Sinatra’s, Mick Jagger’s, and Keith Richard’s partying look like.
Forget high-handed talk of sobriety or scruples or the Academy’s unwillingness to acknowledge the elephant in the room of Charlie Sheen dying before all of our eyes. If the Academy is willing to embarrass the crap out of post-stroke Kirk Douglas, it should get this wide-eyed crackhead to sign a hosting contract while Charlie can still form zany, mostly intelligible sentences.
By the way, I can picture Anne Hathaway, especially, throwing a hissy fit over this morning’s post-mortem reviews. Sheen, on the other hand, would blow off any hint of failure, secure in the knowledge that he’s “a total frickin’ rock star from Mars.” And if any show could use a little rock n’roll ethos, isn’t it the Oscars?