Check out Where Excuses Go to Die on Facebook!

Where Excuses Go to Die will be available in print and in all device formats January 2013.

Meanwhile, a Where Excuses Go to Die Facebook page lets me share what it’s like trying to get this story told; from the disappointed looks I get when I claim to have better hooks than rape, riots, and rotten food to rejection letters and go-for-its I’ve received along the way. There’ve been loonies attracted in the process, constant smoke being blown up my ass, and the dread of asking others to read pages. What a whole separate pathology that is! (Worse than issuing or accepting a personal loan.) And such fun, dealing with those who assume I’m a profit-hungry offender out for a payoff! Finally, there’s being along for the ride as the publishing world makes an ass of itself as it tries not to go out like the record industry. It’s all a completely separate journey from having paid my debt to society for robbing, um, bookstores. Read more

Robin Hood Drives a Volvo

When all else fails, try populism! 

It isn’t official, but given that the Feds love assigning perp nicknames, authorities could dub four alleged L.A. area bank robbers “the Robin Hood Bandits” any minute now. Everyone else has! Having tossed at least a dozen handfuls of money from their getaway car during a pursuit through South Los Angeles, the designation may stick, too, despite speculation that the tactic was more diversionary than charitable. Video clips show people jumping off sidewalks to grab wafting bills, inevitably blocking police vehicles. If I were to guess, I’d say the bandits knew they were sunk and opted to go out with a good PR move.

Maybe they were returning to their childhood neighborhoods as they circled block after block, money and police trailing behind them. On the other hand, it doesn’t look like they took into account the safety of the people upon whom they were bestowing this grand gesture, and at the end of the pursuit a repeat of Florence and Normandie circa 1992 looked about to erupt – unnerving footage for Anglenos here during the King riots. Will these suspects be charged with additional counts of, say, Mayhem or Disturbing the Peace for starting something that could have turned quite ugly? Or will money out the window endear them to the public — and by extension, to a jury? The pursuit footage has already begun to work its anti-hero magic. Read more

Who’s at Fault when Insensitivity Is Learned Behavior?

Last week, Annie Karni reported for the New York Post that victims’ families feel tourists treat Manhattan’s 9/11 Memorial disrespectfully. It’s being leaned against and climbed on; kids are being perched atop its inscriptions by careless, camera-wielding parents; and gabby sightseers are posing for pictures while spilling their Starbucks. Anyone adding to the boisterous atmosphere is on the shit list. Given that far more respectful behavior can be found, for instance, at Pearl Harbor’s USS Arizona Memorial, first responders and victims’ families may be onto something.

On the other hand, might not some of these complaints be an excuse for extending one’s grief or reaffirming one’s precious victimhood? Besides, when society encourages digital aggrandizement of one menial personal experience after the next – and thus contempt for everything outside of ourselves – who’s to blame when insensitivity becomes just another a learned behavior? 

I’m just saying, 9/11 Memorial site or not, the presence of loud, sloppy people who can’t distinguish between hallowed ground and Disney’s California Adventure shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone, not even World Trade Center families. Read more