Sarah Barnes: No Excuses Hero of the Week

26-year-old model and meth-mouth Sarah Barnes couldn’t see what she was doing while smokin’ the Biker Coffee inside the fifth-oldest tree on earth, so she lit an internal portion of the huge tree on fire for better light. Oops. Barnes offered no excuse upon her arrest, instead admitting to burning down the Longwood, Florida tourist attraction known as “The Senator,” and for this we call Sarah Barnes our No Excuses Hero of the Week. Read more

A “Teachable Moment” for the N-Word?

When Lincoln Brown, a white Illinois teacher, found the N-word in a note passed during his majority African-American sixth grade class, he paused to discuss the slur in detail, even explaining why it hurt him to say it. Midway through the lesson, the school’s principal walked in and Brown wound up suspended without pay.

First of all, isn’t a child learning about the N-word better than him or her simply picking it up from some dummy? I say yes, but I’m not sure we need Teacher Brown’s Federal lawsuit against Principal Gregory Mason and Chicago Public Schools (CPS) to get us there. Brown is claiming a violation of his First and Fifth Amendment rights, alleging that his 5-day suspension is both unjust and based on an inaccurate depiction of the episode submitted by Principal Mason. Read more

Welcome to a Worn-out Military

U.S. Marines, unaware that the Waffen-SS insignia epitomizes savagery and malice? Horseshit. The Corps has no excuse for refusing to discipline every soldier here, including the photographer.

Now before you start jumping up ‘n down about how I’m condemning our glorious holy troops, remember that the American Armed Forces are made up of individual young men and women. Read more